The Russians Are Coming, Comrades. Time To BTFD.

To quote one of the greatest thinkers and intellectuals or our time, Jim Cramer-opolis, “NO-ONE CARES ABOUT CYPRUS. It’s just a tiny island near Malta. The ‘Fundamentals’ of the US Economy are strong, which is all that matters. I wouldn’t want to invest anywhere else other than US Equities.” Translation: BTFD.

[Also, the only reason the market is UP right now is because some dim-wit sitting at his/her desk @ 30 Hudson St, Jersey City, NJ, started a rumor that the Russians have reached an agreement with Cyprus to buy Cyprus Popular Bank, and this deal would reduce Cyprus funding needs by 4 Billion Euros. The rumor was of course later denied. But that doesn't matter anymore, because the algos are only programmed to suck the market in one direction: UP]

I beg to differ with this naive assumption by the media that Cyprus is just a small island and whether it stays in the Euro or Exits,  it does not bear any global repercussions as the the ‘Fundamentals’ of the US Economy are strong. If by ‘Fundamentals’ they mean Seasonally Adjusted Numbers, the only thing I’d like to say to them is, Good Luck. Because just this morning, FedEx cut its global growth forecast and Caterpillar reported an accelerated DROP in it’s global retail machine sales. The media interpretation: Nah… They’re lying. They’re just trying to scare us into believing that All Is Not Good. Where’s Ashton… Hey Ashton, come out come out where ever you are. Where’s my Punk’d hat. LMFAOSTFUBTFDDDDD.

Cyprus is a Big Deal. Yes, it’s true that Cyprus is just an Island with a population of a measly 1 million, but there’s a much bigger issue boiling under the skin that no one in the media seems to talk about. Perception. If Cyprus were to pass the levy tax on bank deposits, it will start a domino effect that will spread to Greece, Portugal, Spain, Italy, etc… Because what this means is that if the Governments cannot raise enough revenues to repay their bailout/debt, as more than 20% of the population is unemployed, it will at some point, willingly or un-willingly, have to start stealing money from peoples’ bank accounts. And that my friends, is what’s ultimately going to happen. Deposit Tax or Not, once the banks in Cyprus open for regular business, there will be a Bank Run. It’s just human psychology. Once we lose our trust in someone or something, esp. when money is involved, we don’t give a F%#K what the outcome is; we just want OUT. Period.

Phrase of the Day: Contagious Bank Run